Female Orgasm by the Numbers

5 Jun

As an adjunct to elizaR’s post “finding my clitoris,” the infographic below the break has been going around for months. I first saw it on Twitter, and was astounded. Why? Because these are not numbers representative of LDS women. These are numbers representative of American women. In my opinion, when we’re discussing the church and sexuality, I think it’s necessary to think outside our culture of mis and disinformation and consider that we aren’t the only ones with the problem. I don’t know whether that’s good or bad.

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8 Responses to “Female Orgasm by the Numbers”

  1. elizaR June 5, 2011 at 10:22 pm #

    oooh yes, I saw this when it was making it’s rounds. some very interesting (and sobering) facts.

  2. sylvialyon June 6, 2011 at 4:53 pm #

    Good reminder for all of us who are in the know to be open in helping those who aren’t. It only takes a conversation to help a lot of this ignorance go away.

  3. nat kelly June 7, 2011 at 10:42 pm #

    Wow! These numbers are fascinating! I made my husband read them. 🙂

    What I’m wondering about is how these numbers might be different if you look at man/woman vs. woman/woman sexual relationships.

    The fact that more than 2/3 of women always achieve orgasm through self-stimulation might mean that they just really know themselves, or that they just know women’s bodies. Are woman/woman couples better at helping the other achieve orgasm? Is the difficulty so many women have due to men’s ignorance/lack of awareness, or due to the general difficulty of navigating a woman’s body? I mean, it would make sense if it was the former. The sensation for men is so different, and if they are using those sensations to please the ladies…… it could be a problem.

    Just something I’ve sorta always wondered about.

    Btw, FREAKING LOVE YOUR BLOG! Thanks for doing this. 🙂

  4. sylvialyon June 8, 2011 at 10:37 am #

    Interesting Nat Kelly. My boyfriend and I were having a conversation like this the other day. We are sexually active and were also talking about these numbers. He said that he thinks the reason might be that so many young men tend to learn “how to” give women orgasms (either orally or vaginally) through their watching of pornography. I don’t know if ANY son actually gets the talk from their father about how to please a woman (especially if the father, himself, does not have any idea). Or reads books, or thinks about it long enough?

    As we all probably know, porn is not a real representation of what sex is actually like. The girls in the porn movies start oooing and ahhing as soon as the guy does *anything*. That’s not real life. But I honestly think some men think that it is. I also think some men let their egos get in the way if a woman tries to give directions about doing it a certain way (and *not* the way we’re doing it–we’ve all been there–haven’t we ladies–knowing what the guy is doing is no where near our clitoris and is not going to give us orgasm, but how do we politely tell him to do it another way?) That’s why I think women end up faking it, because the guy *is* trying and they like that he’s trying, but they’re too afraid to say that it just isn’t working.

    It is helpful for the woman to know her body and then feel secure enough to speak up about what she wants. Or if the man is in it with her in the figuring it out (that’s always the most fun and I’ve been really lucky to get such partners–actually–not luck at all, I just don’t have sex with men who aren’t willing to do that with me.)

  5. Eliza R June 8, 2011 at 3:26 pm #

    Sylvia… your comment here NEEDS TO BE IT’S OWN BLOG POST! Stat!!

    I was talking to an (lds) friend of mine the other day, she had just come down off of a fairly brutal conversation with her husband: how do you discuss the fact that for *10 YEARS* you have been faking it because sex was not good, but you didn’t know how to say anything???!!!

    brutal.

  6. Sylvia Lyon June 8, 2011 at 6:44 pm #

    Eliza–you are right!! I will write it up stat!

  7. soulmate August 29, 2011 at 2:26 am #

    Performing cunnilingus can be one of the most wonderful things you can do for a woman. It makes her feel loved, admired, sexy, and has the potential to give her an exceptional orgasm. Many women prefer it to intercourse, and for those who require a large amount of clitoral stimulation, it is the easiest way to orgasm. Besides, lots of women expect it these days and men who perform great cunnilingus are always appreciated and considered fabulous lovers.

Trackbacks/Pingbacks

  1. the elusive “O” « Missionary Position - July 7, 2011

    […] because my impression is that there are a lot of women out there who are not having orgasms (See Lucy’s informative post on *that* subject) and I very much believe that your partner should have your sexual fulfillment a […]

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